[Kitchen Alchemy] PBB & J Sammich

The time? According to my loaf watch, five minutes 'til you're toast.

Whoa there, cowboy (or girl). Let's stop dragon-hunting, sniper-camping for awhile (yeah, leave that poor sap of a noob for later, he deserves a few minutes of life). Can you hear it? Or maybe feel it? Or even both? Yes,, the groan, the howl, the lurch, the....

It's just your stomach growling for some food to eat. You're imagining too much.

You say you're not in the mood to make some grub? Come on, I bet my dirty laundry you play Skyrim while topless. Or even Bounty Hounds Online with no shorts on. Or even both. You get my drift; and you call that 'in the mood'? I call that lazy-ass-of-yours.

Okay, so maybe you're not that really good at cooking. No worries! This simple recipe will ensure that after you made this, your kitchen is still intact, and there's no need to call your local fire department. Hit the break to read on people.

Hawaiian firebreathers need not apply.

Besides, who could ever resist bacon?

I like mine soft, yet crispy.

So what kitchen sorcery am I going to teach you, young 'un? Why, it's the ever-so-simple Peanut butter, bacon and jelly sandwich, that's what! Oldies may know at as the King's favorite sandwich, and Elvis has good taste (though tacky and silly jumpsuit wardrobe).

So let's start cracking 'em knuckles for this recipe.

Ingredients

• bacon strips
• slices of bread (white bread or whole wheat)
• peanut butter (smooth, creamy, crunchy, chunky....pick yer poison)
• jelly (blueberry or strawberry or raspberry jam, heck even orange marmalade will do)
• butter for pan-toasting

Now, let's fire up that stove.

1) Heat your non-stick pan a bit first. When it's warm enough, pan-toast your bread butter-side down first, then swirl it around the pan a bit to grease the pan's surface as well. When it's toasted enough to your liking, flip your bread slices and toast the other side.

2). When you're done toasting, lift your bread and set it aside on a plate. And now, still using the same pan, lower the heat a bit and fry some strips of bacon.

3) If you've noticed, we didn't add any oil or shortening to fry our bacon. Well, we did grease the surface with a bit of butter from pan-toasting our bread, and lowered the flame. We want to render the fat out from the strips, so that it sizzles in its own oil in the long run.

4) Now let those pork goodness sizzle for awhile, and let's turn our attention back to the toasts.

  Now, slather one slice with your choice of peanut butter, and then the other slice with the jam of your liking. Be generous, be hearty. It's your sammich, so enjoy it.

5) Okay, when you're done, let's go back to the pan.

  Hear that? That's the sound of heavenly bacon sizzling and cackling as it fries in its own fat. With the pan slicked, let them strips swirl around a bit, and you can open up the flame to medium high or whatever.

6) The moment of truth: Fry the other side of the bacon strips.

 Ooooh, yeeeeaaahh. See that? That's golden brown goodness. Now I leave it up to you if you want it chewy, or you want it crispy and crunchy in your sammich. It'll only take a minute or two to finish cooking them pork slices.

7) Now, play time's over. Time to assemble your sammich. Place them heavenly slices of pork on top of one of your slices, then cover it with another slice.

And you're finished! Simple, isn't it? Wait, do I hear someone complaining? ....Ah, you mean this isn't a real Elvis sandwich? Well, it may not be a true Elvis sandwich per se, but I can claim it as a variation; a personal interpretation, if classy.

Besides, it's still delicious. Admit it.